In my last post, I wrote about knowing your value, and I got a couple of messages regarding that post. I’ve realized that we place our values on different things and what or who we place our value on can make or break us.
Unfortunately, the variable factors that we use to define our worth are endless. Many of us feel worthless. Why? We’ve felt ignored, invisible, insignificant, useless, undesired, ugly, unloved, or forgotten. We girls are emotional; broken in many ways. Great portions of our identity and our personal value are wrapped into combustible packages of emotion – how we feel about this or that. The truth is, our worth has nothing to do with our feelings.
One area people get their values from is relationships, and I want to address that in this post.
You don’t have to be in a relationship before you’re valuable. A relationship doesn’t give you value; it enhances your values. You don’t have to get all the comments in the world before you feel you’re valuable. Yes, we always want confirmation from others, but it’s not everyone who gets confirmation that is happy. Stay in your lane, define who you are and don’t allow others define you. When everything is said and done, those people who defined your values may leave you and then what are you left with? Be your own boss, love yourself, because if you don’t, no one will, everything will be gimmicks.
As a famous quote from Dr. Myles Munroe goes, The key to an interpersonal relationship is the quality of your intrapersonal relationship. If you don’t like you, you cannot love another. If you don’t like you, and you give yourself to someone, you have given them something you don’t even want. The greatest commandment is to love God and to love your neighbor to the same degree as you love yourself. The foundation for loving others is loving yourself. The value you put on yourself is the value you put on others. If someone doesn’t love themselves they feel they are lacking something, so they relate to you to fill up that lack. So basically they become a parasite.and you become a host for the leech.
Stop chasing or wanting somebody that does not love you. Whoever we are supposed to be with one day, they are going to want you; they are going to pursue you. I used to wonder when some men weren’t pursuing me, and I wonder if I was good enough or pretty enough but I learned quickly that whoever God has for me is going to find and pursue me and will love me, and not only that he will not let go of me because he will recognize my worth and value. And that’s the thing, if you don’t know your worth and value, somebody else is going to determine that for you.So it’s so important you get before the Lord, you go whole before Him and know who you are in Christ.
Ladies, don’t chase no man. There’s a reason why God set in place that men are supposed to pursue. Chase God, He will let the RIGHT MAN chase you. Diamonds are never found at the surface of the ground, just rocks. Rocks are everywhere. You are not a rock!.He who finds a wife finds a good thing and not she. Don’t be desperate and let the men do the chasing. You can be nice and say hi and all but you don’t go after him and chase him down because the thing is a man can spot a needy woman from a mile away. That’s how so many relationships get abused because they don’t know their worth or values and what happens the man sets it for you and you feel like you have to do certain things to keep him. You’re beautifully and wonderfully made in God’s image, and He loves you. Let God write your love story and not a relationship. He has a plan for your life, and He has placed a desire to get married in your heart, and HE will fulfill it, don’t jump the gun. You need to renew your mind on relationships, don’t allow what you see on TV and social media be your deciding factor, surrender everything to God and let Him do a heart work and position you, lead and guide you to open the right doors. And when he opens the right doors, you’ll be so excited and focused on what He is telling you to do.
Your worth is in God. You are precious and highly valuable in the eyes of the One, who sees. And you never, never, never have to worry about being on anyone’s bargain rack again.